More Answers... (01/11/26 Newsletter): Conflict Management: Dose Early, Dose Often...

Hi Everyone, 

Here's your Sunday night "More Answers..." to help you head into the work week. Remember, you can see previous newsletters at askchrista.com/MoreAnswers.

Today's topic? Managing Conflict at Work: Dose Early, Dose Often.
(yeah... like managing symptoms when you feel a cold coming on...)

Managing a Cold (not medical advice, but analogous life advice...)

On January 2nd, I sneezed more times in that one day than I had in total during 2025. "Uh oh," I thought... "a cold."

I was right. The following morning I woke up with the tell-tale signs of that scratchy-feelng throat followed by sinus pressure then mild congestion. Ugh.

I didn't wait for things to get worse, though. I took my first dose of decongestant right away, and continued dosing as instructed on the box for the next four days. My symptoms got slightly worst over the next day, then plateaued. By day four I started to improve (alas, no More Answers Newsletter last Sunday...), and took my last dose. By Day five I sounded nasally and had an occasional twitchy throat, but otherwise felt clear-headed. My bestie remarked about how strong my immune system must be to get over a cold in less than a week.

"HAH!" I responded, "no, no, no... at the first signs of a head cold, I dose early and dose often."

I addressed my symptoms-- the problems-- right away. And although it doesn't feel great to be on decongestants, I much prefer the "dried out" feeling of decongestants to the "stuffed up" feeling of congestion (then the "at-risk" feeling of an ensuing sinus infection). 

It's important to keep up with fluids while sick anyway, right? I can manage the dry-out of a decongestant for a few days.

But after I recovered, I was thinking of how analogous a head cold is with how conflicts fester at work. Some people prefer to address the problems (often the symptoms of something bigger) right away. Others inevitably address the problems only when they become so big they have no other choice.

Are you that person?

Addressing Problems Early Takes Clarity and Courage

Most workplace problems start with symptoms that are obvious, but it's not always clear what's causing them or what you can do about them: a conversation that feels off, a manager who stops looping you in, feedback that feels confusing instead of constructive, a growing sense that expectations are no longer aligned.

Often we do not address the issues right away (the symptoms) because we feel we need to better understand the underlying cause(s) first. But that's not true at all. Most times, addressing conflict is about offering feedback and an alternative to behavior, and all that requires is our ability to address the observable behavior causing distress in the first place.

Further to that, research on workplace conflict shows that unresolved issues tend to escalate over time, increasing stress, reducing trust, and damaging working relationships if they are avoided or delayed (De Dreu & Gelfand, 2008). But who needs research to know this is true?

Consider a common example: tension with a manager.

Early signs might include repeat miscommunication ("I thought that...," "yes, but we discussed and agreed to..."), frustration after meetings, feeling unfairly judged or misunderstood, or uncertainty about priorities. It takes clarity to see that something is not working, and it takes courage to address it early, before resentment or fear builds. And before a chasm appears between you and your manager.

Dose Early, Dose Often (for colds and for conflicts)

Studies on conflict management consistently show that early, direct, and respectful conversations lead to better outcomes than avoidance or delayed confrontation (Tjosvold, Wong, & Chen, 2014). Waiting rarely makes things easier. But again... who needs research to know this is true? (no one... that's who...)

To address issues early, though, you need to know yourself well enough to know what is happening, why, and how you are best equipped to manage it. This is where clarity comes in.

Does the scratchy throat feel like Strep? or does it feel like post-nasal drip? Does the sinus pressure feel like an infection? or does it feel like a garden-variety cold? 

After that, it's about having the right tools, environment, and support around you-- much the same as having the right meds, place of rest, and family or friends to help get you through a cold.

And addressing an issue at work is the same as addressing a cold: the importance of noticing the symptom and choosing to act while the problem is still manageable.

BOOSTER FOR YOUR WEEK!!!

This week's booster is an HBR article from Catherine Cote, published in September 2023. It's called, "5 Strategies for Conflict Resolution in the Workplace," and if you're the kind of person who shrinks at the thought of dealing with conflict, I highly recommend reading it (chock-full of additional resources), and taking notes. It's the type of coaching everyone needs at various times in the workplace.

(And remember, if you have a business challenge or a workplace issue, Ask Christa!)

REFERENCES

De Dreu, C. K. W., & Gelfand, M. J. (2008). Conflict in the workplace: Sources, functions, and dynamics across multiple levels of analysis. The Academy of Management Annals, 2(1), 1–39.

Tjosvold, D., Wong, A. S. H., & Chen, N. Y. F. (2014). Constructively managing conflicts in organizations. Annual Review of Organizational Psychology and Organizational Behavior, 1, 545–568.

(remember: most public libraries in the USA offer access to academic papers; however, if yours does not, then Google these papers to see where they are listed, how you can learn more about them, and how you can find similar papers to learn more about conflict management and conflict resolution in the workplace)